Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
