he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
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