Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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