i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
no, he came in my armpit
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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