Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
