They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
