Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
