We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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