should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
