omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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