Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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