I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
