Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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