I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize