im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize
