She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
