You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Are we still banned from the library?
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
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