yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
