i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
