My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
