Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Randomize
