It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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