kristin has been a bad kristin
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
