I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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