Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize