out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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