Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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