He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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