Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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