She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
