He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize