I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Can Purell be used as lube?
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
