i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
