he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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