Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
