If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize
