Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
