Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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