Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
how does that bad decision feel?
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