she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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