I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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