so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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