Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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