singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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