I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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