Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
