I'm really into asian looking animals
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
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