Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Randomize
