the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
ugly people sure do ruin things
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Just pee around me
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize