Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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