this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
